I Love My Dog
I’ve been alone my entire life. Dating has been a miserable experience, and I’m starting to doubt that a real connection with another human being is even possible. Every man I have met has turned into an asshole, treating me with indifference or disrespect and then getting angry when I don’t want to keep seeing them. I’m tired of wasting my time and energy trying to find someone who genuinely cares about me, even at the ripe age of twenty-eight.
My friends have tried to set me up with some of their own acquaintances, but I can tell right away that it won’t work out. I’ve grown immune to the spark of interest I used to get when I met someone new. Now, I can sense it when someone is only interested in my body, and that’s when I disappear.
Maybe I’m expecting too much from relationships. I want an unconditional connection that is deeper than just physical attraction or monetary gain. “Good morning, Sweetie,” I told my middle-aged Golden Retriever. He sat at my feet while I rocked in my chair on the front porch. “What am I going to do? I don’t want to see any more men.”
I looked at my phone and flipped through the many dating apps I had installed on my phone. Despite the many matches, I couldn’t find any depth in any of the men. “I want somebody who loves me for me,” I said sadly. “Sweetie, you love me, don’t you?”
“Arhoooo!” Sweetie replied. He stood to his feet from the doormat and rubbed against my leg gently. Panting, he curiously sniffed my feet.
“What do you want, love?” I watched as he began to hump my leg. “Oh goodness. Come on, Sweetie. Let’s go get you some breakfast, and me some coffee. How does that sound?”
I giggled, feeling Sweetie sniff up between my legs. He had found my vagina and licked me once before I had the chance to shoo him away. “Go on, I just put fresh food in your bowl.” I saw him wander to the food and begin to eat. “That’s a good boy.”
The smell of coffee filled the air as I waited for it to finish seeping. I felt my phone vibrate, and upon looking at the screen, I saw that today was the first day of my ovulation. Perhaps I’d masturbate later – it explains why I’ve been so horny this morning.
Birds chirping outside made me feel happy and excited for the day. There were no plans for the day, finally. Taking my coffee, I returned and sat on my rocking chair. Sometimes, I felt like I was living the life of an elderly person, but being young and already retired, I bought myself a ranch and… did nothing. I have one dog, but the space is for various animals, including horses, sheep, llamas, goats, chickens, and much more.
I smiled, thinking about my farm and sipping on my hot, dark coffee. This place would someday be a bustling farm. “What are you doing?” I questioned Sweetie. She kept humping my leg nonstop. Usually, Sweetie would finish pretty quickly.